Sixteen Candles

Parker: Mommy what are you watching?
Me: It's Sixteen Candles, one of Mommy's all time favorite movies!
Parker: Is it an old fashion movie?
Me: No Sweetie, it was made in the 80's.
Parker: Mommy, that's what I meant by old fashion movie.

Parkers new obsession in film viewing is none other than the incomparable Barbara Streisand in Holly Dolly!! I, btw...am FINE with this...after all, it has completely distracted her from 3 Amigos. (Thank you lil lord baby Jesus)

As she is singing and dancing along in the living room tonight I ask her...

Me: Baby girl wouldn't it be great to see Hello Dolly on Broadway!!
Parker: Oh Mommy ya! That would be cool. Lets look it up and see if we can go see it on Broadway. Ohhhhh and check and see if they have 3 Amigos too!

So my child has never seen The Wizard of Oz...
I know, I know...Bad Mommy. But in my defense she doesn't come from a long line of people that *heart* this movie. Her grandmother is afraid of the flying monkeys (and really? who isn't). Her aunt is deathly afraid of the movie in general, so much so that I offered to make costumes for all the girls during Halloween to go as the Tin Man, the Lion and Scarecrow on got shot down before it even came out of my mouth! =)
So imagine how excited I was when the beautiful town of Middletown hosted their Family Movie Night only to be showing The Wizard of Oz. I mean what a better way to see it then during the summer, under the stars with a beautiful breeze.
After attending the movie we were walking back to the car when I turned to Parker,

Me: So Babygirl, what did you think of the movie?
Parker: Well, it's no 3 Amigos.

And there you have it ladies and gentleman, my little movie critic just compared a classic movie celebrating 70 years on the big screen to a movie that has a character called Dusty Bottoms.

Parker: "Mommy what is that thing sticking out of her cell phone?"
Me: "It's an antenna Sweetie"


**Good grief...she will never know...**

Whaaaat did you just say??

Parker: Mommy! Did you ever think I would need to wear a belt when I am only 8 and so skinny? You know because skinny people don't really need to wear belts. Mostly just people with big bellies...like you!

((Don't like her much this morning))

Good question...

Last night Parker and I were out shopping at a particular warehouse store, at one point I needed the managers assistance. After being very helpful the manager left and here is what my sweet little innocent child says to me...

Parker: Mommy did you see that her name was Bunny?
Me: Yes Sweetie I did. Sometimes people have different names...I mean look at you! You get to be a "Parker"!!
Parker: So there are people with a name like Tree?


Me: Yes dear...

My future Olympian

Parker: Jeeeeesh my hands are soooooo sore from PE today.
Me: Why? What did you do in PE?
Parker: Pull-ups.
Me: WOW Babygirl!! How many did you do?
Parker: One.

She WILL KILL me for this..

Clothes swap

Parker: Mommy when I see your skinny jeans they look like MY skinny jeans.

Me: Ohhhh Sweetie trust me...we don't wear ANYWHERE near the same size. I am not nearly as skinny as you are

Parker: No Mommy. I'm not saying your skinny, I'm saying you have chicken legs.

In the morning when we get to cuddle...

There really is nothing better then Parker crawling into bed with me, just to get a few more minutes of sleep. The other morning as sweet as she can be, made me realize that I need a man...and better shaving habits.

Parker: Morning Mommy. I'm coming into cuddle with you.
Me: Common' get in (at this point we are in a little "spoon position" with her legs draped over mine)
Parker: Mommy?
Me: Yes Dear.
Parker: You need to shave. Your legs are SHARP!

**It's the winter...I dunno what that girl wants from me???**

Just another reminder that Parker thinks I am ancient...

Me: Hey babygirl what do you think about going to see Avatar? Would you be interested?
Parker: Uh I dunno. It sounds cool but it's PG-13. BUT that's ok. I mean as long as I go in with an adult over 16 I can get in. And YOU...YOU ARE WAY OVER 16, so you could get me in.

**Jeez...thanks can I? Thanks**

BEST. KID. EVER.

Parker is so VERY thoughtful! I woke up to breakfast ready for me! Love her more than life itself!

Did ya miss me?? Ok ok so it's not about me....

I have been gone...I am so very sorry. I know you all are desperately waiting for your next Parker update!! AND WITHOUT FURTHER ADIEU...

Me: AGHHHH!! I swear parking is so frustrating with all this snow!!!
Parker: It's very frustrating isn't it Mommy?
Me: Yes babygirl it is...it just makes me so angry that people can't park!! UGHHH!!!
Parker: Mommy people call that anger management issues.


Parker will be taking appts for her therapy sessions starting in April...

Parkers To-Do List. She had a busier weekend than I did.

Don't know if this will show up as a pic? Remember still new at this whole thing. Either way, here is Parkers list from a few weekends ago...girl had some big plans that again I was not privy. Party? Concert? Dude she's 7 WTF!

Sent from my Verizon Wireless BlackBerry

ZUP

1/8/10

Parker: Mommy what's that ZUP stuff in the green bottle?
Me: Sweetie, that's not ZUP. It's 7-Up.
Parker: Ohhhh so that's soda for kids 7 and older right?

I Have Followers!!! ( I feel like David Koresh)

We have 2 followers!!! Of course 1 is my mother but she still counts!
And thank you for all the phone calls this morning reminding me that I still hadn't posted anything funny from Parker.

1/13/10
Parker: Mommy how come when you take your pants off the skin on your butt jiggles?

Starting bids for this beautiful blond hair, blue eyed child $1.00!!
Do I hear a $1.00??

First things first...not second...that's very important (write that down)

Don't know where this is gonna go but I like the idea. I was constantly posting updates on my Facebook of cute and charming things that Parker said (...ok sometimes they weren't so charming but usually they are damn funny and it's takes everything I have not to laugh in her face some days) My friends mentioned that I need to write these things down so I can remember them. Already I feel like I am behind because I have what feels like years of HIGH-LARIOUS stuff that Parker has said to me.

There are a few stories that stick out in my mind that I repeatedly tell my friends...sorry to those that have heard these a million times. Please bare with me, I will try not to tell these quirky lil' antidotes any more and simply direct new friends to this great blog....sweet Jesus...what the hell am I going to talk about now???

I will update accordingly but I can't promise it will be in any sort of a consistent pattern, as my child clearly has her own agenda to which I am usually not privy.

Thank you for being a part of my new blog!!

h7k
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